The Imaginary Boy

These days, I walk with a cane. Not always, but more often than I’d like. It’s a collapsible cane I keep in the deep pockets of my jacket; I like to wear big, oversized ones. I wear oversized everything. I often feel like the world is too oversized. So, this is how I wear my clothing.

Seated at the depot, waiting for my bus, I look around – as I do, creating imaginary stories in my head about the people buzzing around me. I am not too comfortable around so many people, so I find comfort in my oversized jacket. It makes me feel more confident in a world that often overwhelms me.

“Is it due? Did I just miss it? I knew that I shouldn’t have nipped into the shop,” says a boy as he sits down next to me. We both smile.

I tell him we both missed the bus. He, because he nipped into the shop, and I, just because. We now have a 40-minute wait until the next bus arrives.

And so, we chat.

With my oversized clothing (mostly in black), I am like a human magnet. Strangers engage with me and/or share their story. They share their past, present, their future hopes and dreams and sometimes, their problems. I listen to their stories with empathy, encouragement and often a compliment.

These are my bus stories: my journeys into the rabbit holes of people’s lives.

Not knowing that I have difficulty walking (as my cane is folded, hidden in my pocket), the boy – who is actually almost 20 – introduces himself.

“My name is Reece. I work for a balloon company where we blow up balloons and transport them to different events and for different occasions.”

I tell him what an amazing job that is – happiness delivered by balloon. He tells me that he is the only young man who works on his team. His co-workers are older women. They all support him as if he has many mothers. Even better, I tell him. He shares that he only works several days a week, as his passion is for hiking and climbing mountains.

He then shares that as a child, he was diagnosed with severe problems with his hips. He had many operations that enabled him to walk today, but in constant pain. He knows that he will have several more similar operations throughout his life. He was told that as he gets older, he will suffer from painful arthritis in his hips, as I do now, thus my cane.

He tells me that the thought of the future will not hold him back. He will continue to hike and climb mountains even if it hurts. He said he is fine with that. At this moment in his life, being free is what matters. “I will never give up.”

Our bus arrives. I pull my cane from my deep pockets with a click-clack as it opens into
a useful, strong, straight line.

“Bet you never guessed that”, I said laughingly. He smiles as he waits for me to get on the bus before him. We sit close enough to continue our chat. I tell him how happy I am to have met him. What a great inspiration he is to me. I smile so big, as does he. I know that if he can feel that freedom, embrace his situation and not let it hold him back, then so can I.

I must try harder despite some painful days. I need a cane, but I don’t use it as often. I will use my freedom.

I get off at my bus stop and we both wave goodbye. I hoped to see him again at the bus depot. But I didn’t. I looked for him every day. Did I imagine him? Was I talking to myself and waving goodbye to an imaginary boy?

I arrive home, fold my cane, pour myself a glass of wine and laugh out loud. So, what if
he was an imaginary boy? I am fine with that. On my journey home, I discovered even
more happiness, inspiration and freedom.

My name is Heidi, meaning a girl from the mountains. I don’t like heights; I sometimes
walk with a cane, but there are other mountains in life that I can still climb.

With my imaginary boy in my mind.

Update: Several weeks later, I saw Reece at the bus depot. He smiled and waved at me. I smiled and waved back. Or did I imagine him again? I am fine with that. Sometimes, imagination is better than reality. Imagine often.

Stay Kurious, always.

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