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- An essential guide to being single at 50 and beyond
Either through choice or circumstance, many of us find ourselves single at 50. And despite what society might have us believe, many people enjoy being single and are perfectly happy on their own. However, in the same breath, others are searching for their Mr or Mrs right.
Here, we’ll explore five questions you can ask yourself if you’re looking for love.
More people than ever before are choosing to remain single at 50
According to research, around 40% of adults in the UK are currently single – a large majority of which are aged between 50-64.
Historically, remaining single was largely seen as a negative. And while it’s true that some people still hold this view, many have come to recognise the many benefits that come with staying single.
For example, being single at 50 provides the opportunity to focus on yourself, invest time in what makes you happy, and try new things. After all, even if you do end up looking for a partner, it’s important to love yourself first.
That said, if the decision to remain single doesn’t resonate with you and you’re searching for love, we’ll cover some ideas below that’ll hopefully help your search…
5 questions to ask yourself if you’re single at 50 and looking for love
If you’re on the lookout for love but haven’t yet found your person, there are some questions to consider that may help you in your search.
We’ll cover some of these below…
1. Am I setting unrealistic expectations?
There are certain things that we should all expect from a happy and healthy relationship. This includes enjoying quality time together and being treated with kindness, love, and respect.
However, if you’re setting expectations for a potential partner that are out of reach for the large majority of people, it could hinder your search for love. Some examples of unrealistic expectations include never wanting to compromise, asking your partner to change their values, and expecting them to know what you’re feeling without communicating.
Ultimately, no one is perfect and relationships take work – but anything worth having usually requires effort. If you suspect you may be setting unrealistic expectations and would like to take a different approach, you might like to have a read of Psych Central’s article; Unrealistic expectations and relationships: 5 key signs.
You might also be interested in our article; 9 things to remember while searching for a happy and fulfilling relationship.
2. Do I have unresolved emotions?
If you’ve been hurt in the past, it can feel difficult to overcome these feelings and learn to trust again.
So, taking steps to heal any unresolved emotions you may have can make a huge difference in your search for love. Otherwise, you may unknowingly end up projecting unresolved emotions onto future relationships.
Activities such as journaling and mindfulness can help with recognising and processing unresolved emotions.
3. Is the fear of rejection holding me back?
Whether it’s asking someone out on a date or being honest about how you feel, the fear of rejection holds a lot of people back when it comes to finding love.
It’s not unusual for a fear of rejection to be linked with a lack of confidence, so taking steps to build up your self-esteem can make a huge difference in your search for love and your outlook on dating in general.
If you struggle with a fear of rejection, you might find this guidance on how to stop the fear of rejection from holding you back from Hey Sigmund helpful.
4. Am I looking for love in the right places?
There’s no right or wrong place to look for love. We’re all different and what might work well for one person may not suit someone else. However, there are things we can do to increase our chances of meeting new people – which mainly involve putting ourselves out there and trying new things.
And the good news is that from trying online dating, to joining networks, clubs, and events, there are plenty of enjoyable ways to meet new people and form relationships. So if you haven’t yet found your match, why not consider looking for love somewhere new?
For ideas on where to start, you might like to have a read of our articles; 9 different ways to meet new people and 10 summer activities to meet new people. Our beginner’s guide to online dating over 50 also has some useful information for those wanting to take their search for love online.
If you’re looking to give online dating a go, why not sign up to Rest Less Dating?
5. Am I ready for love?
As we know, society is sometimes guilty of making us believe that we need to be in a relationship in order to be happy.
But the decision to be in a relationship or not should be entirely yours – not the result of what others might think. You might be in the process of moving on from a previous relationship, or simply want some time to work on yourself. So before you question why you haven’t found ‘the one’ yet, it’s worth asking yourself whether your heart’s really in it.
For help with this, you might find our article, 8 questions to help you decide whether you’re ready to date again, useful.
Join Rest Less Dating
It’s free to create your profile and browse matches. If you like what you see, get a premium subscription and start contacting like-minded singles near you.
Final thoughts...
Research shows that more and more people are deciding to stay single at 50. And whether you’re looking for love or not, it’s important to always do what makes you happy.
For more tips and advice, head over to the dating section of our website. Here, you’ll find articles like 12 subtle green flags to look for when dating someone new and 7 ways to start a conversation on a dating app.
Or, to meet singles over 50, you might like to sign up to Rest Less Dating.
What are your experiences of being single at 50? Which of the questions on our list did you find the most helpful? We’d be interested to hear from you in the comments below.
Cynthia Spillman was CEO of The International Dating Academy, a one-stop dating shop for people who wished to improve their dating skills. Her area of expertise is in mindful relationships for the mature person. Her second book, 'From Dinner Date to Soulmate', is a witty and empowering route map for older women searching for love.
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