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My two furry companions are 15 years old (Arthur) and 16 years old (Ila) and, in truth, they’ve probably had the same dog beds since I got them. Well, I say that, but what I really mean is the same interior stuffing. The covers have had to be regularly replaced because of the irrational assumption, particularly on Ila’s part, that there are ‘snakes’ lurking in the corners of every room.
Before getting comfortable she always first checks in case any of those pesky snakes have slithered up onto her bed. She does three circles clockwise, scratches at the surface beneath her paws, then reverses and goes anti-clockwise, scraping and scratching again. Arthur is the easier, more rational one. I only have to say: “No snakes Arthur!” and begrudgingly he’ll stop mid-circle and just lay down.
Ila, on the other hand – and I believe deliberately to make a point – will begin round two. She’ll repeat the whole process with at least six circles in both directions if I dare to say anything. Add to this the punishment of being regularly shoved into the washing machine and bed covers just don’t last very long.
The dog bed in the sitting room was definitely looking rather sad, with several botched repairs to the cover, when we had our neighbourhood jumble trail. One of the neighbours (whose husband is an upholsterer) had several end-of-roll remnants of a beautiful, thick velvet which gave me an idea. As one roll was a gorgeous sage green (almost identical to the greens of my sofas) it made me think of having a rather plush, new cover made that would match my decor and be more hard-wearing.
It was an immediate hit! Arthur absolutely loved it and has made it his permanent residence but, sadly, every time Ila has tried to get a look in on a bed that they used to share, he’ll creep in behind her and stretch out, pushing her onto the carpet. Add to this the fact that Arthur can no longer make it safely up and down onto my bed and, I’m ashamed to say, has had to rely on a pile of old pillows covered under a blanket, I decided I needed to take some proper action.
My neighbour’s upholstery business announced a remnants sale, so I hot-footed it down there and picked up several wonderful, colour-coordinated materials. I planned to use these to make a trio of plush, new dog beds covered in stunning velvets of superior quality that will match their settings. One for Ila in the sitting room, a new cover for her favourite bed in the dining room, and a super-duper new bed of par excellence for Arthur in my bedroom. Well, that was the plan!
Thrilled when the finished beds arrived yesterday, I immediately turfed all the old bits and bobs from the bedroom into the bin, placed Arthur’s new bed in his favourite spot, and replaced the bed cover in the dining room. I also laid out Ila’s new, super comfy, gold bed, so that she wouldn’t keep getting shoved off the green one by her brother.
Come bedtime I settled Ila in the dining room (being almost blind now she’s not safe with the stairs in the dark) and, excited to see his reaction, took Arthur upstairs to bed. It was not as expected. He behaved like I’d introduced a giant, threatening monster into his life. He point-blank refused to go anywhere near it and when I picked him up and placed him on it, he behaved like it’d burned his paws and immediately shot off it.
Placing a couple of liver sizzlers (irresistible) on its centre, I got into bed convinced that he’d find the sizzlers, give in, and curl up on it eventually. Come 2.30am he was still wandering around the bedroom, occasionally whimpering, and shoving his cold, wet nose under my covers and onto my skin in protest. Reluctantly I was forced to give in.
Struggling into my dressing gown I plodded down the stairs and out into the freezing garden where I had to rummage through the bin in the dark to retrieve his old blanket. I then had to upend Ila and wrestle the golden bed up the stairs where I placed it where the new, super-duper one had been. After covering it in his manky old blanket, I stepped back.
Immediately he climbed on, gave it one quick circle, and curled up on it, snoring loudly before I’d even made it back into bed. Needless to say, I found going off to sleep a great deal harder than he did.
I sense that I’m going to need to find a plan B. I’ve contemplated hog-tying Ila, rolling her around the new bed in the belief that if he thinks it’s hers, he’ll take to it – but perhaps that’s a bit extreme. Alternatively, colour-coordination out of the window as all the stuffings are different sizes, I may be forced to leave things as they are and try Ila on the blue one, even if it doesn’t match the decor (she screams hysterically)!
Eye bags bulging, I regaled this saga to their breeder and my friend this morning who came back with: “Och, they’re strange, wee creatures sometimes!” That isn’t what I called Arthur at 2.30am this morning!
P.S. Arthur would like it noted that in the picture accompanying this piece he isn’t, in fact, sleeping in the middle of the day. On the contrary, he’s practicing his yoga and carrying out the highly skilled, upside-down roll position as performed by a master.
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