This article was written for Annabel & Grace, which is now part of Rest Less.
It may (or may not!) come as a surprise to you that us older people are continuing to enjoy an active sex life well into our eighties. And that’s not really surprising when you consider the multiple benefits of sex after 60.
So, let’s have a quick peek beneath the sheets to find out why sex is so good for us…
Sex increases emotional connection – and people with emotional connections live longer
Once a woman is past menopause and there’s no chance of pregnancy, many couples find it easier to relax and look forward to lovemaking. And partners who are retired or working only part time often have more time and energy for each other.
Sex after age 60 may take place less often, but many women find increased sexual pleasure after menopause, including more frequent or more intense orgasms.
Studies have found that older adults who have regular sex have better memories
Making love keeps you healthy by releasing an antibody called immunoglobulin that protects us from infections. Oxytocin is also released when the body climaxes – aches, pains and headaches often disappear afterwards.
Making love also lowers blood pressure, reduces stress, cuts the risk of a fatal heart attack by half for men, boosts self esteem, improves intimacy, and helps keep the pelvic floor muscles healthy, decreasing the chances of incontinence in later life.
Regular sex relieves tension making you more relaxed, less depressed and helping you to sleep better. It also helps the brain to produce serotonin, the mood lifting chemical found in antidepressants.
Now that’s a pretty impressive list of benefits. But it’s not always that straightforward is it?
For example, sex can be physically demanding putting stress on our hips, knees, or back. If that’s the case then you we can try positions that utilise larger muscle groups – like missionary, spooning or doggie style. Most of us aren’t going to be able to do Kama Sutra positions any more (we probably need reading glasses to see what they are!) but exercises that help with flexibility (yoga for example) can really help.
By midlife, you know your own body and your partner’s intimately, and, hopefully, you’ve figured out how to communicate what you find pleasurable. But for some of us, sex has become a bit routine, a bit predictable. So you could perhaps try being intimate at different times of the day. Try sex before dinner and then eat – it completely changes the vibe of the meal.
If you have a new sexual partner, body image can be a real worry. Gravity means that parts flop that we’d rather stay put. Things hang lower than expected. Keep in mind that they probably have a few unwanted jiggles, too. Perhaps use candles and dim the lights. If you’re not comfortable undressing in front of a new partner, get into bed before them.
Not everyone has a significant other. Sex toys often open up a whole new world to women, keeping vaginal tissues moist and elastic and boosting our hormone levels. Remember, orgasms are good for you!
So, to sum up, whether we have a partner or not, it seems we should definitely make time (however tired, stressed, podgy or grumpy we are feeling) for a healthy bit of sex over 60.
A&G readers are entitled to 15% off with code AG15 at the Lovehoney website.
A National Council on Aging survey reported that 70% of people in their sixties who have regular intercourse find their sex lives more satisfying than when they were in their forties.
According to recent UK research 86% of men and 60% of women aged 60-69 years reported being sexually active.
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