According to research, people make an average of 35,000 decisions each day. Some are simple, like what to eat for dinner, and others are more complicated – like deciding whether to leave your job for a new one.
But with so many daily choices, it’s no wonder that we sometimes struggle with uncertainty. Whether caused by anxiety, upbringing, or a lack of confidence, taking steps to become more decisive can offer various benefits.
With that said, we’ll explore some of the things that can make even the smallest choices feel insurmountable, and offer tips on becoming more decisive.
What makes us indecisive?
Various factors can cause indecisiveness. In many cases, there isn’t a single cause, but a combination of factors.
Whether it’s a major or minor decision, being indecisive can impact your life, so it’s something worth working on.
Causes of indecisiveness include…
Anxiety
Research has linked indecisiveness with anxiety – specifically, a tendency to overthink anything and everything that could go wrong when faced with making a choice.
As a result, avoiding or at least prolonging decision-making serves as a distraction and offers short-term relief from the anxiety of making a choice.
Interestingly, research has found that anxiety decreases activity in the area of the brain needed to make decisions; and there’s also evidence that anxiety can cause people to make quick, rash choices in an attempt to avoid discomfort. For example, studies show that anxiety can make it more difficult for people to accurately process all the information needed to make a good decision.
If you’re struggling with anxiety, you might find it helpful to read our articles; 7 tips for coping with stress and anxiety and 8 things to do with your hands when you feel anxious.
Parental influence
Sometimes, the root cause of indecisiveness can stem back to childhood and parental influence. The result is that you end up relying on others to make your decisions for you.
Sport and performance psychologist Heley Perlus, says, “If someone has grown up with overbearing parents, they may not have had the opportunity to make decisions independently. As such, once they’re given the [chance] to make a choice, they’re left looking for someone else to make that decision for them.”
People pleasing
People pleasing stems from an emotional need to make others happy, even if it comes at the expense of your own wants and needs.
Unsurprisingly, this trait can interfere with the ability to make decisions as people may find themselves stuck between what others want and their own needs.
Fear of failure
Fearing failure can make it difficult for people to make decisions because they may worry about making the wrong choices – often placing too much pressure on what’s right and wrong. The same can be said for people with perfectionist personalities.
According to clinical psychologist Dr. Carla Marie Manly, fear of failure can sometimes stem back to childhood. She says, “Those raised in environments where decision-making is seen as an opportunity to learn and grow tend to feel more comfortable making choices. [Meanwhile], if decision-making becomes associated with making errors or bad choices, indecisiveness often results.”
Lack of confidence and self-esteem
Self-confidence is a key part of decision-making, and people with low self-esteem may naturally doubt their ability to make good choices.
For example, this study found that indecisiveness is associated with low confidence.
If this is something you’d like to work on, you might like to check out our 16 ways to improve your confidence and self-esteem.
Being stuck in a comfort zone
When it comes to making decisions – particularly bigger ones that carry more weight – being stuck in a comfort zone can sometimes hold us back.
For example, finding yourself in a relationship that isn’t right for you but offers comfort can make it more difficult to decide whether or not to leave.
That said, comfort zones can also impact our ability to make more minor decisions. For instance, you may have found yourself in a routine of eating the same three meals each week, and find deciding which new ones to try difficult or overwhelming.
Our article, 18 ways to step outside of your comfort zone, offers lots of ideas to help you try new things.
Lacking knowledge on the subject
Sometimes, indecisiveness is simply the result of not having enough knowledge to make an informed decision.
This reason is less internal and more down to circumstances.
Mental health disorders
Indecisiveness can also be a symptom of various mental health conditions, including depression, ADHD, and PTSD.
What are the benefits of being more decisive?
Considering the number of decisions we’re faced with each day, it’s no wonder that learning to be more decisive can bring a number of benefits. These include…
Being more decisive can save time
In her book How to Decide, American author Annie Duke revealed the staggering amount of time that being indecisive can cost us day-to-day.
She found that, per week, the average person spends 150 minutes deciding what to eat, 90 to 115 minutes deciding what to wear, and 50 minutes deciding what to watch on Netflix!
Even if it’s just a few minutes each day, time spent making decisions adds up. So, learning how to make smaller, everyday decisions quickly can end up giving us a lot of time back.
Being more decisive can increase positivity
Research shows that becoming more confident in your decisions can boost feelings of positivity by increasing self-assurance.
One reason for this is that when you’re more decisive, it increases belief in yourself that you have the skills necessary to carry out a plan.
Being more decisive can help you achieve your goals
American writer and philosopher Ralph Waldo Emerson said, “Once you make a decision, the universe conspires to make it happen.”
While this might not always be the case, what’s true is that being more decisive can help you develop skills that’ll ultimately draw you closer to your goals.
Alongside improved confidence, research shows that being more decisive often goes hand-in-hand with better adaptability, resilience, leadership, and problem-solving skills.
Being more decisive can remove distractions
Being indecisive can prevent us from living in the moment by always being stuck on working out our next move.
However, studies have shown that getting better at making decisions can remove a significant amount of distraction, allowing you to be more present.
Being more decisive can lead to better outcomes
Decisions made in a panic can be impulsive and lack consideration – not always leading to the best outcomes.
However, becoming more decisive can not only make it easier to come to decisions, but to make better, more informed choices too.
10 ways to be more decisive
So how can we be more decisive? We’ll cover some ideas below…
1. Take steps to boost your confidence and self-esteem
As we know from research, a lack of confidence can impact our ability to be decisive. This can be particularly true if it manifests in characteristics like people-pleasing and fearing failure.
Luckily, there are plenty of ways to boost confidence and overcome these traits. You can find inspiration in our articles; 16 ways to improve your confidence and self-esteem and People-pleasing – what it is, why we do it, and how to balance it with your own needs.
2. Practise stepping outside your comfort zone
If it’s feelings of discomfort holding you back from making decisions, it can be helpful to practise stepping out of your comfort zone.
This can be in small ways to start with; for example, trying a new recipe you’re unsure you’ll enjoy or striking up a conversation with a stranger in a coffee shop. Often, once we see that nothing bad will happen, it can help to give us the resolution we need to go after what we want.
It can also be helpful to remind yourself that stepping outside your comfort zone is a positive thing – as it’s here that we tend to grow the most. Check out our article, 18 ways to step outside your comfort zone, to learn more.
3. Listen to your gut instinct
Overthinking can make it incredibly difficult to reach decisions. For example, research shows that information overload makes decisions significantly more challenging.
It’s for this reason that turning to gut instinct can be useful when it comes to making choices.
We aren’t suggesting that you rely on gut instinct alone – particularly for bigger decisions, but it’s worth taking into consideration. For example, studies show that pairing gut feelings with analytical thinking helps people make better, faster, and more accurate decisions.
4. Take care of your mental health
Anxiety can play a large role in indecisiveness – as can other mental health conditions like depression and PTSD.
In these cases, addressing the root cause of your indecisiveness can be a valuable step.
If you’ve been struggling with your mental health, you’ll hopefully find some helpful advice on the healthy mind section of our website. Here, you’ll find information on topics including stress, anxiety, and depression.
5. Try journaling
If you’re facing a bigger decision, journaling can be a useful tool to help you work out and consider your options more clearly.
You could write down your fears, worries, or apprehensions about a decision; explore the possibilities of each choice; or create a simple pros and cons list. Often, reflecting on journal entries with fresh eyes can make everything clearer. For example, you may already know what the right decision is but be initially held back by fear.
Check out our article on the power of journaling as a life habit for guidance on how to get started.
6. Work on becoming more comfortable with the idea of failure
Fear of failure can make decision-making difficult. But the truth is that we all get things wrong sometimes, and that’s okay – we’re only human after all.
If fear of failure is something you struggle with, it can be helpful to practise putting things into perspective and considering what’s the worst that could happen if things don’t go as you hoped. Very often, it’s not as bad as we imagine it to be.
Plus, according to experts, because of the way the mind works, we tend to view decisions as permanent – particularly if they carry a lot of weight. However, this often isn’t the case either – and reminding yourself of this can help to take some pressure off.
7. Narrow down your options
In his book, The Paradox of Choice, Barry Schwartz points out that the greater the number of options we have to choose from, the more time we’re likely to spend in analysis paralysis.
And, indeed, research shows that facing information overload makes decisions trickier – largely because more information needs to be evaluated, which can lead to overthinking.
Studies have confirmed that avoiding having too many options in the first place is one of the most beneficial steps to take. It’s thought that this may be particularly beneficial for people who struggle with anxiety, as things can easily become overwhelming.
So, if you have several options, it can be helpful to consider narrowing it down to three, for example.
8. Set clear goals
It’s far easier to make decisions when you know what your goals are. Goal setting can help to keep us on track and gain a clearer idea of what decisions do and don’t align with our hopes and dreams.
For example, if you plan to save money, decisions around impulse-buying can suddenly become a lot clearer.
If you’re interested in setting goals, you might like to read our articles; 12 resolutions that aren’t just for January, How to create an inspiring vision board, and What’s your five-year plan?
9. Provide yourself with enough information
While it’s best to avoid information overload, it’s also important to provide yourself with the facts needed to make a decision.
For example, if you’re considering moving to a new area, it’ll be helpful to do some research into what it has to offer.
10. Flip a coin for smaller decisions
It may sound simple, but if you struggle with making small, everyday decisions, such as what to wear or what to buy at the supermarket, then flipping a coin can be an excellent time saver.
Sometimes, if you find yourself disappointed with how the coin lands, it can also help you to recognise what you really wanted.
Final thoughts...
Many of us struggle with being indecisive, but the good news is that there are plenty of ways to improve at making quicker, smarter, and more effective choices. And even better news is that you’ll probably feel happier for it too!
For further reading, head over to the healthy mind section of our website. Here, you’ll find plenty of other self-development articles, including tips on empowering yourself every day and how to slow down time.
Do you struggle with being indecisive? What helps you make decisions? We’d be interested to hear from you in the comments below.